The Eve

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Philippians 4:6

Well you may be asking yourself what I, a social, outgoing, happy and young girl, am doing at ten o'clock at night on the last Saturday of Thanksgiving break.  I am writing a blog.  This may seem boring but it is a lot more interesting than what I was doing earlier, which was crying.  You see, I have a problem.  But it is not as much as a problem, but an answer.  How is it an answer? Well you have to know the question.


How can I love the Lord more than I ever loved before? How can I become closer to him, and repay him for his grace, light, and love?


Lets start from the beginning.  Almost a year ago my best friend did a boy fast- a Matthew, Mark, Luke and John fast - and quit boys for a month, doing devotionals and turning to the most important guy in any girl's life - the Heavenly Father!  This has always inspired me to do something to test my faith and to push my faith further, to become a better Christian and to be a girl God is proud of!  I have been feeling far from God lately, like something is missing, and I feel like he is calling me to him, calling me to do something. 


Fast Forward. I love to love, and I love love.  I have had two boyfriends, and they have consumed my life for the past three years.  But neither worked out, which brings me to tonight.  I was sitting in my mom's bed, crying and feeling bad for myself when I had a thought:  What if I devoted all of the thoughts, energy, time and love that I devote to the guys in my life to God instead?  It makes sense, because my Lord is the most perfect man - He always listens, He always cares, He is never too busy and no problem is too small.  He always has an answer, a plan, and He sure loves me- He made me ME!  So, I am going to try to devote all of my energy that I usually use to talk to boys, text boys, flirt with boys, and think about boys (or as it may be, a certain boy), and channel it through devotionals, through psalms, through the Book, and through talking and praying to God!  God will never break my heart, and I do not want to break his.  It is a perfect task for me, a perfect time for me, and a perfect journey to take.


I have to figure out the rules that I will follow and how I will handle situations, but with God as my best friend, my guide, and my Lord, I am not afraid, not in the least bit.  So tonight is the eve of my new relationship with the Lord, my challenge to focus my time and energy into him and his vision.  So wish me luck and keep me in your prayers!


A Child's Prayer for Morning
Now, before I run to play, 
Let me not forget to pray
To God who kept me through the night
And waked me with the morning light. 
Help me, Lord, to love thee more
Than I ever loved before, 
In my work and in my play
Be thou with me through the day.
Amen.